Tucsonshire
2004-03-04
11:23 a.m.

Heh. I put up my favorite banner yesterday, and this makes me happy. I miss having Photoshop, as I enjoyed using it as a tool to teach the world that Precious Moments figurines are, in fact, evil. Evil.

I don't think that there is much that scares me more than the figurines. Except maybe the fact that you can get married in Precious Moments Land at the Precious Moments Chapel of Freaky Vacant Eyes. I swear that those innocent little lambs and teddy bears and sundry and just waiting for you to go, "Awwww," so they can rip your jugular open and then piss in your occular cavities. I'm on to them.

Okay then. Moving on. Also on today's adgenda is the fact that there is a British grocery in Tucson. SQUEEEE! I have been without my mint Aero for many months (okay, almost 2, since I got back from England (I'm a spoiled brat)), but, dude, they sold it in the grocery stores in Boston. In the grocery stores! Now, we no longer have the Irish section. The international section in the 4 (4!) grocery stores within 3 miles of my house in suburban Pod People Land consists of Mexican, Asian (which sucks - no udon. Where am I supposed to get my Udon here? WHERE?), and Italian. I'm sorry, but they're suprisingly proud of their collection of Ragu and Prince spaghetti and Old El Paso. The Old El Paso is especially funny when you consider that I could be in Mexico in less than 45 minutes if I just changed out of my pajamas and got in the car. (And started it and drove south, etc.) Anyway. No Irish section. Lackluster Asian section (it's ramen and soy sauce). BAH. But! Now! Hob Nobs! Aero! God Save the Queen!

I am such an anglophile, I feel like there should be a 12 step program. I have no idea what started it (my wee British great grandmother?), but it's culminated in me reading Heat magazine religiously, secretly thinking that my life would be more interesting if I lived in something with "-shire" on the end (Tucsonshire?), and saying "quite" and "brilliant" to myself when no one else is around. Sad.

I am a babbly little nugget today, no? I'm in the process of planning a vacation which will not include either Ireland or the UK, which is Very Weird for me. It's a whole new world when you take those out of the equation. I am trying really, really hard not to accidentally book a trip to Scotland and claim that I thought it was part of Scandinavia. Am I afraid of not speaking the launguage (the only one I can even claim part proficiency in (besides English) is French) or am I afraid of not being able to get Chat magazine and Violet Crumble? I need to branch out, man. Big time.

We were thinking Switzerland, but then I heard it was the most expensive country in Europe, and that just blew me away. I mean, I just got back from London, and I could swear I spent about 20 bucks on every sandwich. The idea of anything more expensive than that frightens me. Cold sweat, etc. It makes me feel like I should get a job. Shudder. So, until I can confirm that Switzerland is out of range (we were going to hike between towns in the Alps), I am open to suggestions. If the dollar is doing well there (or at least not abysmally), all the better. I know that's a lot to ask right now, what with the dollar sucking donkey and all.

Okay! I have to call people and ask them questions about taxes and mortgages and all that. Good times.