Hey, make your monkey noise.
2004-05-31
3:36 p.m.

High school flashback time!

This morning, I had a random high school flashback. It's a good one.

So, one thing I excelled at (but, for some reason didn't mention on college applications) in high school was an ability to make a really realistic monkey noise. I was a weird little nugget, so I'd occasionally bust out with it at school.

One day, before homeroom, my best friend and I were just walking around in the aimless sophomore style, and she said, "Hey, make your monkey noise." And I said, "Okay," and did it, thinking nothing of it. Totally harmless, yes?

Except not. We had this vice principal who looked like a monkey. So much like a monkey, in fact, that he came flying over, stuck his finger in my face and screamed, "Would I do that to you?"

I was totally shocked (I didn't even know he was around) and I stammered some kind of apology, and he stormed off. My friend was dying laughing, and the entire crowded hallway was silent with shock. I felt awful, and I still feel vaguely bad about it.

A few months later, on Valentine's Day, another friend got a Aladdin valentine with the little monkey on it, and she exclaimed, "Oh, he's so cute!" and held her hands up like a monkey, imitating the card. The vice principal beamed down out of nowhere and freaked out on her, too.

Ha? I wonder if he maybe ran up to monkeys at the zoo and yelled at them for mocking him. Good times.